Monday 21 March 2011

Try to avoid Stun Blasts, as they may leave you disorientated.

This weekend, I was at home. At home, I have all my stuff. Therefore, this weekend was a massive excuse to play video games in quite unhealthy doses. However, this didn't quite work out to be the case, as it took me two days to eventually start playing one of the THREE games I have yet to play since getting them around my birthday in October. The reason for this: I felt bad starting them without my girlfriend around.

In the past, when I've had a much freer access to my PS3 or whenever I've been desperate enough to use Katie's brothers' XBox, times would come about where I would play a game whilst Katie watched; apparently enjoying herself in doing so (though I have my doubts). This happened often, to the extent where she has bought me games in order to facilitate this habit. And it's really nice. There is no better feeling that swooping around Arkham Asylum whilst leaning against a comfy girlfriend. So much so, however, that when I get to situations where I have a new game and it isn't a sports sim (which is obviously where she draws the line) I wait until she is around to play it.

And so, the conundrum of the previous weekend, where I went home on the Thursday evening with Katie coming down a day later. What to do in the intervening time? Simple: I have the aforementioned three games to get going on and a whole day to kill doing it. Just like I had wanted. Except when I went to pick a game to play, I was troubled. Discounting Fallout 3 as it would have been too much to take on over 3 days, I had to decide between Enslaved and Assassin's Creed 2. Seeing as Enslaved is based on Monkey: Journey to the West and has Andy Serkis as the main character there was seemingly no contest. But this would mean starting without Katie. This was unthinkable. She'd miss the story. I couldn't do that to Katie. Which pretty much sums up how dependant I am of her, soppy fool that I am. And so, the game I had waited ages to play had to wait a bit longer for Katie. And instead I played FIFA with my old housemate, Chris. And even won a few times for once.

And then, do you know what I played Friday morning? Sim City 4. I honest-to-God cannot explain why, but I did. I scrabbled around for the disc, waited for the usual Maxis load up screens to finish trying to be funny and attacked my allotted square of land for which to try, for once, to build a tangible and thriving community upon.

Except I couldn't. That goal still eludes me. Once more the evil mistress that is Sim City laughed in my face as I constantly ran out of funds without getting one poxy skyscraper. I quite royally failed at Sim City. But I know I am not alone. The world is full of wannabee cityscapers who have had their dreams crushed in Maxis' Iron Fist of Unforgiving Torment. The thing is, that game is so insanely hard to keep balanced whilst still progressing (at least, it is for the impatient). I could just about sustain a small farming community, but the moment I pushed for the swankier gubbins that I have heard the game contains I fell flat; mocked by the red numericals that soon denoted my available moolah, hoping for a business deal to keep my income a bit closer to my outgoings. I know; that is such a boring trouble to have in a game.

But I think, maybe, that that is the point of the game. It is in fact a governmental tool to create sympathy for their efforts so they get less of a negative reaction when the do something unfavourable. If health funding is suddenly lowered than, rather than take to the streets demanding this be reversed, you sit back calmly, remarking how you know exactly what they must be going through after your troubles keeping Funkytown, USA afloat after you had to build all those Fire Stations after it expanded. If people were actually able to beat the game and build the next New York on their laptops, people would start to believe they could run things better. And that's how revolutions start. And so there is this impossible game; thwarting all who attempt it so that Democracy can be maintained. T'is the only logical explanation.

Incidentally, I did eventually start on Enslaved and it was great! By no means the perfect game but fun to play and a really novel retelling of Journey to the West. Sadly, I have no idea how long it will be till I can get back to it. This is very sad.

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